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  “First you want to bite her, then you want to mate her,” he said under his breath. If he didn’t say it out loud he might end up saying it to Liv. Or he might end up screaming. As man or beast, it had happened a few times in his life. A werewolf version of a temper tantrum, a rapid back-and-forth shift between human and wolf, raging all the while. It was painful, exhausting and, in the long run, entirely unhelpful.

  Garrett pulled out a block of cheese and roughly hacked off enough squares to cover a small red plate. He had wanted to bite her right as he came. Not bite her to get off but bite her. Break the skin, draw blood, mark her as his. The instinct had been as big and blinding as the natural instinct to give in to an orgasm. Then once he’d gotten himself under control, he made the crack about children.

  “Idiot,” he said. He pulled a sleeve of crackers from the cabinet. “Fucking idiot.”

  “Who’s an idiot?” Liv asked.

  He turned too fast and the eye shine must have shown. For just an instant she stilled, looking the tiniest bit uncertain. Then she smiled and came to him. “Me. I’m an idiot. I upset you,” Garrett said.

  “Not at all. I’m fine.” She took the crackers and a beer and walked out of the room, leaving him to follow. So he did.

  “You were upset. You thought you’d done something.” He walked behind her and did a double take when she bypassed the living room and the dining room and hit the steps to go upstairs again. “Something tells me you think that a lot.” Garrett watched her lush bottom as she climbed the stairs. No wonder she made him crazy. Lush and feminine, the perfect hour-glass shape, she was trim but not skinny. There had been plenty of warm, soft woman to hold onto as he’d fucked her.

  She turned and caught him staring. She grinned at him, berry colored lips spreading wide to show him a flash of white teeth and rosy pink tongue. His cock stirred to life and Garrett had to remind himself to inhale. “Old habits die hard.”

  “Pardon?” He’d lost his train of thought and when she continued up the steps, the train derailed even further. He watched the tug and pull of her muscles under that lust-red robe and all he could picture was driving into her again. Fucking her so that she made that needy little sound in the back of her throat. Screw the beer and the food, Liv was all he needed for the rest of the night.

  “The blaming myself for things. For every breath and frown and angry glance of every person in the world. All of it is usually my fault,” she said, brown eyes flashing in the low light from the streetlamps outside. “So wherever you went in your head just then was clearly my fault.”

  “Of course,” he said, watching her stop at the doorway to his room.

  She turned and they were fully close then. His chest an inch from her breasts. His lips not much farther away. He closed his eyes and the smell of her filled his head. Above the beer and the cheese and the crackers and old carpet and rain, the scent of her soared. He held his breath and heard her heart beating. Fast and lively, she was excited. He knew that this time, yes, he could hear her heartbeat because she was close enough to lick and sniff and fuck. “I’m sorry,” she said.

  “For what?”

  “I should have asked. Can we eat in your room? May I?” She smiled.

  “Liv, baby, you can do anything you want. At all.”

  She blushed, dipped her head and at that moment he realized that what he felt in his chest, his stomach—his cock—was the first tentative stirrings of love. He was screwed.

  Garrett watched her lick the tiny bit of cheese off her pointer finger and thought he might drop dead right there. Could you die from wanting a woman? He thought so. His heart felt too big, his baggy sweats too small, especially in the crotch area. And his windpipe had apparently shrunk to drinking straw size. Not many women affected him at all, let alone this fiercely. Liv was a whole new ball game. Liv was a new star, a perfect storm, a fantasy he’d never expected to realize. Liv had made him shift in front of her as easily as drawing a breath. Liv, so far, had made him think the word love without wanting to wreak havoc, scream at the sky and destroy.

  Garrett didn’t know what to do with this information, it would scare her. So he listened to her talk and nodded and tried to ignore his extremely intrusive member.

  But she didn’t. Her fingers closed around his cock through his pants and she squeezed. “Did you hear anything I said?” She pushed the waistband down and shifted her weight so she could run a loose, warm fist up and down his shaft. It was the most magical feeling Garrett could recall for a very long time.

  “I did my best.”

  “And that was?”

  “About every other word.” He grinned, thrusting just a bit, without thinking, into her hand. He ran his fingers over her cheeks and lips like he could steal her secrets just by touching her. He leaned in to kiss her and she put her mouth to his chest for a brief hot second and bit his nipple. Garrett pushed her back, fast and hard, pinning her to the bed. “Careful, Liv. Inside me is an animal and those things you do with your teeth mean a lot where we come from. In our culture.”

  She nodded, her big brown eyes as serious as hell. She parted her legs and he settled there, running the hard ridge of his cock to the wet, slick valley of her pussy. “I want you all over again,” she said. “That’s scary.”

  Garrett rocked against her. All of him feeling her but his eyes watching her face for every flicker and truth. “Why’s that?”

  “Because I’m a sex camel.”

  Garrett dropped his head and laughed. It felt good. A loud explosive sound that filled up the tiny room and was perfectly accented by Liv’s softer, more feminine laughter. “Is that so? You seemed pretty un-camel-like just a bit ago.” He pushed his hands high on her bare thighs and watched a fine tremor start in her body. Her eyelids fluttered and she inched just a tiny bit closer.

  “That was because of you. I’m not really good in the men department in case you hadn’t figured that out. So I don’t have much call to turn down or have scads of sex.” She paused for a moment, thinking and then smiled. “Let me clarify, good sex.” Her hand made another lazy tour of his hard-on.

  Garrett grunted. He had no comment on that asshole he’d ejected from her house earlier. He reached behind him, grabbing for a foil packet from the still-open drawer. His body was getting ahead of his mind. He was a little Liv-drunk at the moment. He kissed her hard, parting her lips so that she had to open for his tongue. Her mouth yielded to his and those cool fingers stroked him again. “You don’t really need that. I’m on the Pill. I’m all clean and safe and shiny.” She arched against his exploring hands and laughed. “I’m damn near brand spanking new.”

  “No. We use this. Got it?” He tried to keep his voice easy and soft but despite his efforts some steel crept into his tone. She went tense for just an instant. Garrett felt her heartbeat race and then slow and in a great rush of air she said, “Fine. Of course. Safety first.” Then she parted her legs and the heat of her blanked out his rational mind. He rolled the condom on and in one hard thrust was seated in her again. The perfect heat of her cunt gripped up around him and Garrett began to move.

  He could love her. He could fuck her. But there would be no productive mating. No young ones. He couldn’t do that to him or to her or to the possible offspring. Being a wolf was too damn painful sometimes.

  Chapter Six

  Changes

  Liv came in a blink. They came so fast with him, rushing at her like sudden balmy gusts of emotion and pleasure. She gripped his shoulders and shuddered under him, giving in to her orgasm. There was a flash of something in her that felt like disappointment but Liv pushed it away. She stilled him and he braced himself over her, breathing hard. Liv wiggled under Garrett and he groaned. Liv wiggled lower and he grabbed her upper arms, holding her still. “Where you going, Little Red Riding Hood?” he whispered, doing his best to give her a wolfish grin.

  It sent a shiver down her spine but his humor and ease with her lightened her insides. “Down a bit.”

  “
Oh yeah?” He slipped up higher on the bed, bracing himself on his forearms, head dipped to watch her wiggle lower.

  Her feet hit the floor, her bottom brushing the edge of the bed. She found his hipbone with her mouth, sucked and then bit him. Her fingers plucked at the condom and pulled it free. She pushed her mouth to his skin, licking the salty hot flat of his flank. He thrust without thinking, sighed deeply. The sound and sight of pushing this big, big man just a bit too far out of his comfort zone thrilled some part of her. She felt power and want and excitement swirling in her belly, her brain buzzed with it. She licked above his cock, running her fingers through his short, dark pubic hair, tracing the beginning of the line with the rigid tip of her tongue so he did that jittery thing with his hips.

  “Liv, if I die, I can’t fuck you again,” he said. Liv could tell he was trying to joke but the words came out on little puffs of air that made him sound both vulnerable and confused.

  Liv loved it.

  She touched her lips against the crown of his cock, running them softly around the tip without actually taking him in her mouth. He shivered above her like he might fall. She hoped not. He looked pretty heavy.

  “Do it, Liv. Open up. Look what you’ve started.”

  She raised her eyes to see him staring down at her. The flashes of lean and dangerous animal evident in his features if he shifted his head. Like a hidden picture, a magic painting, something just beneath the surface. He licked his lips, watching her with those intensely blue eyes, and he pushed just enough to pop her lips apart and slip the very tip of himself into her mouth.

  Liv found the small slit with her tongue and sucked. His face grew dark as he fought for control. He shivered harder and Liv gave in. Gave in to herself and to Garrett. She opened her mouth and rose up, taking the hard, hot length of him into her mouth. She sucked, tasting the salt of his skin. The wild, rich earth smell of him filled her nose. He smelled very much like a forest in autumn. A smell that had always soothed her. Garrett felt so much like home to her. The kind of home she had always dreamed of, safe and welcoming. She pushed the thought away, arching up to take him deeper.

  “Jesus Christ, Liv,” he said but he smiled. His hips shifting so that his cock filled her throat. He watched and she knew it was for signs of discomfort or fear. She countered by gripping his hips with her hands, stroking his skin with her fingertips. She slipped up and down his cock with her mouth and relished the power she had at that moment in time. It was Liv who finally pulled back, looked up and said, “If I keep going, I’ll finish,” she admitted.

  He moved to the side and Liv pulled herself up, touching him here and there as she did. His skin was hot and human under her hands and she wanted to feel what she had felt earlier. Liv put her head down, afraid he’d laugh at her or think her a thrill junkie. But she found the nerve to ask. This was Garrett. She could show him all the strange little bits of herself. At least that’s what her heart said.

  “What’s wrong?”

  Garrett leaned in, dark hair falling in his eyes. He kissed her, resting his hand against her throat so that her pulse beat against his thumb and pinkie. He growled softly. It was a sound that never failed to turn her just a bit inside out.

  “Nothing’s wrong. But will you change for me? For just a second? Don’t laugh at me.” She smiled as if to ward off any humor he might feel.

  He didn’t laugh, or even smile. He glanced once at the patch of moonlight on the floor and then he was melting, reforming, shifting and flickering so fast and perfect her eyes could not keep up. Liv felt like she was trying to a focus on a movie that had jumped its reel. It was impossible. The result was fantastic. A huge, daunting gray wolf with eyes the color of an October sky, settled on the bed. Head cocked, tongue lolling, eyes pinned to her, asking what’s next. What now?

  “Nothing major. Nothing dirty.” She laughed and felt her cheeks color. “I just wanted to feel this again. All of this power in a warm, dangerous package.” Her fingers burrowed and slipped between tufts of silken hair. Some of it was coarse and tickled at the fragile dips between her fingers where the skin was thinner and paler. She rubbed her feet along his flanks again, the hair brushing the soles of her feet so she jumped a little with the sensation. “I’m amazed that you don’t hurt me when you’re like this. Not because you would hurt me,” she hurried on when he looked confused. “But because we’re taught to fear so much. Each other, wild animals, strangers, people in power and people with none.” Liv twirled tufts of hair between her fingertips and Garrett licked the back of her hand, panting patiently. His eyes were like live wires. Gas flame blue. Perfect, true…aware.

  Liv kissed his snout and he reared back, sneezing. She laughed and he seemed to grin. “I have spent all my life afraid. And here you are a coiled mass of muscle and jaws. You could kill me in the space of time between my heartbeats and I feel no fear at all. I feel more powerful than I ever have when I’m touching you. Probably because you could savage me and leave me for dead…but don’t.”

  The wolf seemed to nod in understanding. Liv gently pressed the pads of his paws with her fingertips, careful not to hurt him because she knew those spots could be sensitive. The plump sandpaper feel of those places made her understand how much he trusted her. It was one of the few places where she could hurt him, truly. The easiest place to inflict injury or pain, to draw blood. “Now will you shift back and take me? I have all the powerful feelings in me I can stand right about now. I’d like you in me now, Garrett. Right now.”

  She didn’t have to ask him twice. He reared back, the movie jumped its reel again and Garrett was over her, sweating lightly, smiling hugely. He rolled on a fresh rubber and then fitted himself between her thighs. “I don’t know what this means. Why I trust you or why you wanted me that way. You’re kind of fucking with my head, Liv. Making me think and feel things I’m not so sure I can handle,” he said as he slipped into her. Liv threw her head back, closing her knees to his flanks, letting her body grip up around him so that her belly and cunt thrilled at the full friction of him moving inside her.

  “I know the feeling. Intimately.” Her fingers dug into his back. Smooth, hot skin where a moment ago there had been fur. His lips crushed down to her throat, teeth testing her flesh but not biting. Human lips, full and pink where a moment ago they’d been thin—the thin black lips of a wolf. Garrett dipped his head and sucked her nipples, alternating until she pushed up to meet his mouth, with greedy little movements. He bit the flesh between her breasts gently and Liv heard herself as if from far away whisper, “You can bite me for real. You can bite me and I won’t care, Garrett. I’m not afraid of you at all.”

  “That’s a mistake,” he said, thrusting faster. Her offer seemed to have pushed him that fraction past the point of his self-control.

  Offer or request, Olivia?

  “Telling you it’s okay?” The first orgasm rushed through her. So big and so fast she didn’t quite know it was coming until she was crying out in his ear, biting down on his lobe as her body seized up around him, milking his cock. Garrett groaned but kept thrusting. His hands pinned her arms above her head, his face pressed to the crux of her shoulder and throat as he fucked her.

  “Not being afraid of me. Trusting me. All of it,” he said to her ear and she jerked with a shiver and chill.

  “I do trust you.”

  “There are ways I can hurt you without hurting you,” he said.

  She pitied him for a moment. To think he would not realize that she didn’t know that. “I’m aware. I’ve been hurt in lots of invisible ways,” she said.

  He stilled, his hands pinning her hands, his blue eyes locked with hers. “I’m sorry.” He rocked against her so softly, then. As if he feared she would break or crumble under his weight. “But I have…”

  “Have what?” He had stilled but her body could not. Liv lifted, pulling him down with her hands even as she moved up to meet him with her body. She tightened her pussy so that he blinked, blinked again, closed his eyes, his
jaw set and tense. Holding on.

  “I’ve lost a lot. And I think part of what I lost is myself.” The confession seemed to free him and he bore his weight down on her, crushing her to the mattress that squealed and complained.

  Liv wondered what he had lost, sensed this wasn’t the time to ask. “It’s fine. It’s fine,” she murmured to him like he was an innocent. “You don’t have to say and you don’t have to bite. Just love me, right now. Come with me,” she said, realizing she was about to come again, swept up in his emotion and his scent. The world outside could have stopped for all she knew. The mild rumbles of a passing storm echoed. “And then let me sleep here. Hold me. Just for tonight.”

  “Just for tonight,” he laughed. “That’ll be hard. I can’t imagine not being near you now that you’re here,” he said and came. His teeth finding her throat, gripping so that the skin tingled and she hoped against hope. But no. He did not bite.

  His hands tangled in hers as if he was tugging her slowly toward a release.

  Maybe one night he would use his teeth. Maybe one time. But for that second as her orgasm filled her pussy, Liv grasped at the happiness. She’d take it for now. She wouldn’t push. This one moment in time was already more than she’d ever had for as far back as she could remember.

  ———

  Urges

  Liv slept with her head against his chest. Garrett watched her, he watched the moonlight. When he closed his eyes he watched the mental movie in his head of him shifting, taking her, biting her, changing her. Caring for her as the effects took. The bite of a lycan to a human could result in two scenarios. The bite and the blood became infected and the bitten died a horribly painful death much like the influenza epidemic that wiped out so many lives. High fever, pain and dehydration racked the patient. Eventually, the brain basically boiled, the body knotted with pain and then the patient succumbed to the toxic bite. The second scenario was better. The body accepted the invading saliva and embraced it. On some cellular level they were simpatico and the human became a hybrid. Part wolf, part human. A made creature.